[Photo credit: The images in this post, including the cover image and  Marta's photo, were taken by Egle Slowlands]

Let's be honest: relationships are difficult for most people. Sure, it may be easy to start a connection. But if you want deep, meaningful friendships, partnerships, or family relations - it's often not obvious how to get there.

 That’s because we’re constantly negotiating between our need for safety and our need for expansion.

The closer the relationship, the more apparent this becomes. On the one hand, we want to feel safe, loved, and  “be ourselves.” On the other, we want to try new things, experiment, and push edges. 

We want our relationships to help us grow. That's how we know they're meaningful.

For this to be possible, safety must come first. Only when we feel a solid foundation of safety are we able to take up risks. As John Bowlby, a British psychologist and the first attachment theorist noted, “life is best organized as a series of daring ventures from a secure base.” 

How to build that secure base in relationships is a question both universal and individual.  As mammals, we're wired to live in tribes, we respond to certain social cues as a species. At the same time, due to our individual stories, we all have a different pieces in our jigsaw puzzle of establishing safety.

In this workshop, you'll be invited to explore how Authentic Relating practices can enhance a sense of safety for YOU. This will happen through first bringing more awareness to how you communicate. Then, you'll have a chance to practice asking for what you need.

All in a playful but at the same time profound and safe setting!

This workshop is designed for those who:

Everyone needs to have a target audience now, right? :) It helps me to structure my events when I'm thinking about who this is for.

So, I dedicate this workshop to those who"

• Want to have deeper and more secure bonds with their closest people
• Are eager to allow more parts of themselves into in their relationships
• Are willing to get uncomfortable in the short-term to feel safer in the long-term
• Believe that communication skills are part of becoming a better human
• Are guided by  compassion, consciousness, and courage
• Believe that building better communities and society is still possible

As much as I'm dedicating this to a certain group of people, don't be limited by those bullet points! If you don't fit this description perfectly and at the same time, you're curious… please let's prioritise your curiosity!

Important note: My style of running these relational workshops isn't to give you “the right answer” for how to be. Instead, they are designed to make space for you to find your own answers. 

Social life is full of nuance and “it depends…”. My role as a facilitator is to create space in which you discover what works for you, and trust that.

What are we working with?

Here are a few frameworks this workshop is anchored in.

Mindfulness. The foundation of connecting to others is always your connection to yourself. We’ll have mindfulness mini-practices sprinkled throughout the evening to give you a chance to come back to yourself in between engaging with the group.

Authentic Relating. Authentic Relating games are playful but at the same time profound interactions, with a structure and a time constraint. They invite you to slow down the way you show up in any given interaction, name what’s going on for you, and get curious about what’s coming up for the other person.

Basics of the Polyvagal Theory (PVT). I’m fairly new to PVT and by no means an expert on it. At the same time, I’m beginning to introduce its basic concepts into my workshops, as they can help make links between what we experience in social setting and what goes on in our bodies.

What exactly will happen?

I often feel uncomfortable going to events where there's no preview of what will happen. It impacts MY sense of safety. 

That's why I want to give you a preview here - even thought slight tweaks  to this structure are still possible.

Overall, we’ll "dissect" different elements of social interactions and investigate how they impact your sense of safety.

• First, we will set a context that empowers you to take ownership for your experience. This includes how safe you feel. We’re working in a frame that aims to empower YOU to initiate communication styles that serve you. That's usually more effective than expecting the other person to serve you safety on a plate.
• Then, we will do a grounding practice. Connection to self supports connection to another.
• Afterwards, I'm planning on some embodiment games. This means playing with physical distance, eye contact, and touch to notice how body language impacts your sense of safety.
• We will also experiment with different dynamics: pairs, small groups, and full group. This will be a chance to notice and name how different group sizes and modes of participating impact your nervous system.
• Finally, we'll put all of this into practice. One way this can look is learning how to ask for what you need to experience safety in connection with others – and, coming up with ideas for what to do when you can't get what you need.

At the end, there will be integration time and harvesting insights, before we all go our own ways.

Price, accessibility & other practicalities

Here's some practical information  you may need about the event.

• When: 17th October, 6-9pm. Please arrive 10 minutes before to settle in.
• Where: Sahara Studio, 11C Murieston Ln, Dalry, Edinburgh EH11 2LX. Unfortunately, this venue isn't wheelchair accessible. There's a set of stairs to get into the room.
• Who: Marta Brzosko from Connection Hub and one co-facilitator still tbc. You can read a note about Marta below, and check out her website and newsletter for more information.
• Price: £20 per person. Concessions available upon request for those for whom price is a barrier. Please email hello@martabrzosko.com to ask about this.
• Refund policy: Full refund up to 10 days before, and refunding half the price up to 5 days before the event. No refunds when you give me less than 5 days notice. Please email hello@martabrzosko.com to request a refund.

If you'd like more information, please email me your questions - I'll be happy to see your email in my inbox. :)

About Marta Brzosko

I've been facilitating Authentic Relating and connection events in Edinburgh and online since 2020. I've completed the Authentic Facilitator Training from Authentic Revolution, as well as other relational and mindfulness courses, including a post-grad diploma in Mindfulness & Compassion studies.

Day-to-day, I live, work, and volunteer at The Salisbury Centre, one of the oldest community hubs in Edinburgh. I think of it as my spiritual home that's deeply nurtures me, but also a playground for learning about group dynamics and community building.

I'm also a published author with a newsletter called Connection Hub. There, I share stories, tools, and ideas around creating authentic human connection and communities. One day, I want to move out of the city and start (or join) a tribe of people committed to deep communion with Nature and each other.